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      故事 文章 日记 语文 作文 读后感 手抄报 演讲稿 在线投稿
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      我的酒鬼老爸

      小故事网 时间:2016-04-25

        1

        我恨了宋建国很久。久到漫长的青春期时光里,我所有的努力,都只不过是为了有一天变得足够强大,然后带着我妈离开他,也离开这个家。

        你猜得对,宋建国是我爸。

        如果你见过那种嗜酒如命的人,又或者看到过那种喝醉后喜欢撒酒疯的人,就能想象出他的样子。因为他,原本最美好的青春岁月,变成了我生命中极为黯淡的一段时光。

        我爸时常喝得不省人事,我妈想尽办法阻止他。后来实在没办法了,只好将家里的现金、存折以及银行卡全都藏了起来,然后再去家旁边的各个小店打招呼,请他们帮忙不要卖酒给我爸?墒撬苡邪旆ㄅ骄,然后在大街上喝得不省人事。有熟人看到了,会帮忙打电话通知我妈。我妈一边气得发抖,一边又不得不骑着电瓶车去找他。

        常常让我觉得后怕的是,喝多了发酒疯的他,会抡起胳膊打我和我妈。酒醒后,他又一个劲地道歉,忏悔,请求我们原谅他。但原谅有什么用呢?下一次,他照样恶习难改。我心疼我妈,而我能想到的最好的办法,就是带我妈远离这个家。

        很长一段时间里,我一直没办法说服自己接受我爸。因为,我曾见过最好的他。

        我的酒鬼老爸那个存在于我记忆里的男人,风趣幽默,睿智大气,在我心里就像一座山。所以后来的我,很难将眼前这个躺在地上喝得云里雾里的男人,和父亲这个角色画上等号。

        有时我挺怀念他下海经商前的那段时光,日子苦了些,但那时候,当老师的他儒雅得像个绅士。是在我十三岁那年,他突然改行做生意。起初踌躇满志,但投资的生意很快就将家里的存款全都赔了进去。

        从此他一蹶不振。嗜酒如命的毛病,就是那段时间养成的。

        其实他不喝酒的时候,还是那个慈祥可亲的父亲啊。甚至某些瞬间,我会恍然觉得他仍然是那个让我膜拜,让我觉得骄傲的男人。只是有些东西,到底还是不一样了。

        我对他,渐渐就有些厌恶起来。发展到后来,那种厌恶夹杂了恨意。

        2

        我没办法不恨他的,他几乎毁了我整个高中生活。

        我清晰地记得,那个夏日的午后。高一课堂上,数学老师在讲解一道几何题。讲到一半的时候,窗外突然传来一阵叫喊声。有人喊“谁是林海,给我出来”,我们班教室刚好在一楼,听得格外清晰。而我一下子紧张得心跳到了嗓子眼,因为那个身影,以及那个声音,我都再熟悉不过。

        对,那个人是我爸。

        他跌跌撞撞地闯进教室的时候,我恨不能找个地洞钻进去。我低下头,看着他在门口嚷“谁是林海?出来!”安静的教室瞬间乱成一锅粥,大家七嘴八舌地讨论,这人是谁,为什么找林海?我大抵猜出,他是翻到林海写给我的情书,喝醉后直接跑教室来撒酒疯了。我战战兢兢地回头看一眼坐在角落里的林海,他一脸茫然地看着我爸,不知道发生了什么。

        数学老师想维持课堂秩序,但我爸嚷得更厉害:“林海到底是哪个臭小子,敢拐骗我女儿。我告诉你,门儿都没有,赶紧给我出来。”

        我手足无措地坐在座位上,真不想承认他是我父亲。但下一秒,他跑到我的座位前,拉着我的手说,小雅,咱们……咱们回家,爸;つ。我能说什么呢?我要如何告诉喝醉了的他,我不需要他的;,他不给我惹事就已经万事大吉。

        因为他,整个教室陷入混乱,所有人都用异样的眼神看着我。我急得趴在桌上哭了起来,他仍然赖在教室里,嘴里嚷着“林海,林海,快出来”。一直到数学老师叫来保安,将他带走。

        是在那天之后吧,我成了学校里的“小名人”。他让我颜面尽失,也让我高中三年都在学校里抬不起头。全校的师生都认识我,即便叫不出我的名字,也知道我的代号——“那个酒鬼的女儿”。

        要命的是,我还连累了林海。原本只不过是一个男生懵懂的小爱情,被我爸这么一闹,弄得人尽皆知。一直到高中毕业,林海都没再和我说过话。而我再也没有收到过任何一个男生的情书,甚至连女生也逐渐远离我。一切只因为,我有一个可怕的酒鬼爸爸,谁知道哪天他喝醉了会做出什么出格的事呢。所以我的整个青春期,都是孤独的。我觉得,孤独的根源在于我爸。所以,我有足够的理由去恨他。

        被孤立的那段日子里,我唯一的乐趣是读书,一直读到青春只剩下惨淡的灰白色。好在后来我终于如愿以偿,拿到重点大学的录取通知书。从上大学的那天开始,我的人生目标变成了,拿奖学金,努力赚钱,有一天将我妈接到身边。

        好在,大学校园里没人认识我爸,我慢慢从高中的阴影里走了出来。身边有了一些朋友,也逐渐开始尝试着接受爱情。每次宿舍卧谈会上说到各自父母的时候,我说得最多的是我妈,很少提到他。而大学四年,我和他通电话的次数寥寥可数。偶尔他打过来,还没说两句,我就借口有事,匆匆挂了电话。

        我就这样在自己和他之间,设置了一道防线,将他挡在了心门之外。

        3

        后来的这些年,我工作,恋爱,买房,直至婚期将近。

        我一直不想带男友去见他,被我妈说得实在没办法了,只好在电话里和他反复强调,不许喝酒?墒,他趁我和我妈去买菜时,直接拉着男友下馆子去了。最后自然是喝得大醉,又哭又闹地和男友唠叨个不停。在我看来,他唠叨的全是没用的废话。临走前,我和他大吵了一架。

        有了这样的前车之鉴,我态度非常坚决地,拒绝他参加我的婚礼。

        他知道后,对我破口大骂,说我没良心,说我不尊重他。曾经我最崇拜的人,变成了这个样子,要我如何去尊重他?

        我妈劝了我很久,我还是态度非常坚决地不肯改变。结婚那天,我在后台补妆时,伴娘突然跑进来说:“亲爱的,你爸蹲在走廊上哭呢,你要不要去看看?”

        “不用了,我不想看到他。”是,我不想见到他,不想让他在酒桌上胡乱喝酒,破坏了我一生中最为幸福的时刻。

        遗憾吗?当然。

        最幸福的时刻不是自己的父亲牵着自己的手,来交给另一个男人,怎么可能没有遗憾?但比起这样的遗憾,我不想让自己的婚礼,成为一场闹剧,或者一个笑话。

        天知道他用了什么办法说服司仪。双方父母致辞的环节,原本应该我妈上台发言,可司仪念的是我爸的名字,然后我看着他从角落里站了起来。这些年过去,他到底是老了,走上台的步子有些蹒跚。而他一开口,我就忍不住红了眼眶。我爸说的第一句话是,小雅,对不起。

        然后他接着说,对不起,小雅,我还是厚着脸皮来了。我就想,我女儿最幸福的时刻,我怎么能缺席?我知道这些年,我很混蛋。伤害了你,也伤害了你妈。我在这里发誓,从今天开始戒酒。只是,你还愿意再相信爸爸一次吗?

        我下意识地用手里的捧花,遮住了脸。我不想在他面前哭出来,这些年,最难过的时候,我都不肯在他面前掉眼泪?墒,他说着说着,我终于泣不成声。是我太自私,人生最幸福的时刻,不给他参与分享的机会。

        我该谢谢他,因为即便我把他推得很远,他还是来了,让我的婚礼得以圆满。曾经的我憋着一股劲,恨他毁了我的青春期,也毁了原本幸福的家。其实在他上台的那一刻,我就在心底原谅他了。

        也许不仅是我原谅他,我也应该请求他来原谅我。原谅我,这么任性地将他挡在我的世界之外。以后的时光里,我想拿出全部的耐心,陪他一起戒酒,让他重新做回那个让我骄傲的老爸。

      分页:1 2
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